HEADS OTAIL

 Our heads; your tale

March 2, 2011

Panty Worship

Dear HOT,

Let me start by saying that I am male and 100% hetero. I am very attracted to women, so attracted to them that I often fantasize about being one of them.

I love to go into my wife’s closet when she is not there and play with her clothes. I find women’s clothes so much sexier than men’s! I would love to put on her panties, but they don’t fit. So instead I like to wrap them around my cock while I masturbate, especially the satin panties.

Is this a terrible violation of trust? I am terrified that she will catch me, which makes me think I must be doing something very, very wrong. But it doesn’t feel wrong when I do it! It feels like worship. If I were her, I think I would feel honored, but I have no idea how she would react.I adore this woman and don’t want to jeopardize our marriage, but I feel terrible keeping this secret from her.

What should I do?

—Panty Worshipper

 

Rake says:

You know, as long as I have been doing this, I never get over how much a little bit more information would help. Such as why you feel as though she would freak out. Are you both living in the bible belt, was she raised the daughter of a pastor and didn’t lose her virginity until your wedding night? Since I can only speculate, I’ll just imagine a middle-of-the-road upbringing.

Look PW, sex is important to people. Your wife is supposed to help you with sexual fulfillment within reason. Having sex with puppies is not within reason. Cumming on dolls in the Toys R Us is not within reason. But, PW, masturbating with her panties and then washing them for her afterwards is within reason. It’s WAY inside that ballpark.

So, not only should you tell her about it, but you should tell her as a matter of fact, enthusiastically and with a full expectation that she will jump on board.

But I warn you, if you expect her to react badly, she will read that you feel guilty about it and you will get off far worse than you would have otherwise.

Don’t keep a secret, don’t let it jeopardize your marriage, and re-frickin-lax about it.

—Rake

Ava says:

Let me first assure you that I have no doubts as to your heterosexuality. Not that I care, frankly. But the fact is that most cross-dressers, despite popular imagination, are straight.

Second: YES, THIS IS A VIOLATION OF TRUST. You are going into your wife’s things without permission and committing sex acts with them. Call it worship, call it a favor, call it whatever you want, PW, but the fact is that it is non-consensual. Until you let your wife in on this, you are, essentially, raping her lingerie.

I definitely encourage you to bring this up with her, but not in a teary “Oh-god-what-have-I-done” confessional. Instead, casually bring up your fantasies involving “worshiping” her panties while the two of you are making love, as if it’s just one fantasy among many. Try taking her panties off of her and use them to stroke yourself in front of her, as part of foreplay. That way you can gauge her reaction, as well as giving her a positive association with your panty fetish.

Who knows? She may get so turned on watching you do it that, later, when you call her at work and tell her you’re in her panty drawer, she’ll get wet rather than pissed.

And if she freaks out, PW, then you know that you’re going to have to choose: the wife, or the panties.

—Ava

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